First and foremost, I cannot thank enough those who reached out to me personally in response to last month’s thoughts on Lies We Tell Ourselves. Your kind words and encouragement mean more than I would ever be able to express in written form, through a post.
From the feedback I received, it became apparent that many leaders have experienced similar doubt in their decision making, when faced with uncertain or ambiguous environments.
When Healthy Doubt Becomes Harmful
As we discussed last month, having doubts about a plan before it is executed is a healthy way to identify any gaps or weaknesses, which can improve the chances of success. However, these doubts proved debilitating when they lead to the lies I told myself and resulted in chronic self-doubt (feeling as if no decision or plan is ‘good enough’), perfectionism (believing that nothing other than ‘zero mistakes’ is failure), and overworking (trying to achieve already unrealistic expectations by ‘working harder’). All key characteristics of what is commonly referred to as Imposter Phenomenon.
Understanding Imposter Phenomenon
Imposter Phenomenon, a concept first introduced by psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978 and more commonly referred to today as Impostor Syndrome, is the internal experience of feeling like a ‘fraud’ despite any evidence of success. Individuals with imposter syndrome often attribute their achievements to luck, timing, or deception rather than competence or effort[1]. Similarly, any evidence of failure is intensified to that of ‘unequivocal truth’ and ‘reality’ that ignores competence or effort.
Why Leaders Are Especially Vulnerable
Consistent with both research and what our team is learning from working with so many invested leaders, is the fact that this phenomenon is common among decision makers who feel the ‘weight’ of decision making when lives are ‘in the balance’. These leaders desire to achieve success because it results in lives being saved (Department of Defense, Public Safety Sector, etc.) or lives being radically changed (value focused, mission specific, and human oriented corporate companies). These leaders may feel marginalized if they believe the false notion that they are the only ones who feel this way, which is yet another harmful lie we tell ourselves.
The Consequences of Believing the Lie
The result of this lie? Research reveals leaders are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and burnout, driven by chronic self-doubt and the fear of failure[2]. The shift of the healthy ‘weight of leadership’ to these burdens can often lead to strained relationships and impaired communication, as individuals misinterpret feedback through a lens of inadequacy[3]. Over time, this internal conflict erodes confidence and discourages risk-taking—ultimately limiting the very thing an organization so desperately needs (in our opinion) to accomplish its mission: innovative and inspirational leadership.
Quiet Confidence: The Antidote to Imposter Phenomenon
The anecdote? We believe that leaders can combat this phenomenon by cultivating a ‘quiet confidence’ that is the direct result having both confidence and humility in equal parts and strength.
Why Confidence and Humility Must Work Together
Both sides are critical and must be simultaneously ‘big’. Never one without the other. Humility without confidence may lead to the chronic self-doubt discussed in detail above. Confidence without humility is just as debilitating as imposter phenomenon, as it results in a hubris where leaders will not look for or listen to ‘gaps’ in the plan that will lead to mission failure. This quiet confidence is born from a leader’s belief in their inherent knowledge, skills, and abilities alongside the graciousness afforded through the realization that no one can execute any part of leadership (or life) without error.
At Michael Rainey and Associates, it is our belief that empowering leaders who already understand the weight of leadership, with the ability to break the patterns associated with the lies we tell ourselves, results in quiet confidence throughout the organization, and the healthy work environment critical for mission success!
If you’re interested in exploring how we can assist your organization, we invite you to reach out for a complimentary consultation. Let’s discuss how we can help you achieve your desired outcomes and move forward with confidence.
[1] Clance, P. R., & Imes, S. A. (1978). The impostor phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research & Practice, 15(3), 241–247.
[2] Ojeda, L. (2024). Impostor phenomenon and burnout. In K. Cokley (Ed.), The impostor phenomenon: Psychological research, theory, and interventions (pp. 81–109). American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/0000397-005
[3] Garba, R., Coleman, C., & Kelley, T. (2024). The impostor phenomenon and mental health. In K. Cokley (Ed.), The impostor phenomenon: Psychological research, theory, and interventions (pp. 61–79). American Psychological Association. https://doi.org/10.1037/0000397-004
